Why do men get along easier than women?

warning: long post ahead. read this when you're taking a massive dump. a normal dump will not suffice.

For some reason or another, if I get along with two girls that I think are very nice, it usually doesn't translate into those girls getting along with each other.

It's a sight to behold when it happens: they either ignore each other, or act really nice in a fake way. It's such a shame that such things exist but they do. I've given this some thought as to why this happens, and from my education in evolutionary biology, and reading such anthropology books about development of human civilization and behavior like Guns Germs and Steel, and Mean Genes, here is my hypothesis.

Let's say we're viewing a hunter-gatherer tribe. The men start the day with the daily hunt. They have to stay focused and work together, because a mistake from one guy can totally blow a kill. So if two guys have a problem, they might throw a few punches to get it out of their system. Then they let the hard feelings go in order to work together and bring home a buffalo. Then they celebrate by sharing the peace pipe after dinner.

How would the woman's day go about? They would be taking care of the home. While not taking care of the children, they would be doing other household chores, like knitting clothes. Basically they would interact mostly inside the home and not so much with other women in the community. Well they would be around the women, but there wouldn't be any teamwork oriented goals, mostly just working within their family for the family.

The way evolution works is that those who have the best physical or behavior traits in a particular environment/timeframe will have the highest "fitness" based on how many children they have, and how many of those children will grow to have children.

I am postulating that over the millions of years of human development, the men with traits of teamwork were able to bring home the big game and share with each other when one member was starving. The loners would constantly have to go after rabbits and squirrels, and he would die if he couldn't succeed. Therefore teamwork gene passes on.

The women probably worked in a different way. Those who stayed close to their kids and dedicated all their resources to them had a higher fitness level. They were more likely to have grandchildren than the women who didn't really care for their kids upbringing. Thus they passed on the gene that encouraged isolation within the woman's personal circle.

This makes sense if you think about the two things a child needs to grow up: physical resources and love. In traditional views, the father provides most of the resources and the mother provides most of the love.

So while women were passing on the loving family gene, a nasty side effect may have been the distrust of "the other": people outside the inner circle. And since the hunter-gatherer women spent most of their day in contact with each other, its not hard to see them start comparing stuff: "my children are smarter than her children" ... "my husband is stronger than yours, and he is a better hunter" ... "oh yeah? well im prettier so i bet i can steal your husband from you" ... blah blah blah.

Now here is the really interesting part that I don't have a hypothesis for yet. How come men can insult each other and still be good friends? in fact, the more we bust each others' balls, the closer we are. But that would make women tear each other apart. i cant imagine a woman saying to another: "girl your shit stank! it must be what you ate because you suck at cooking!" lol if Frosty told me that I'd bow down and start thinking of a better comeback. But anyway, I digress, back to the topic at hand.

We are a product of our genes. Things that tempt us are because our ancestors had these tendencies, and it kept them alive. Unfortunately our genetic evolution took millions of years to evolve and what we have now is genetic lag. In leaner times, we developed a strong taste for fat because it has the greatest calorie to weight ratio. Great for packing on storage for famines! Now that we dont have famines anymore (due to agriculture) our love of fatty foods is fudging us up the wazoo. Another example is that women of ancient times didn't go to work, they stayed at home with the family. Now that women ARE going to work, that genetic lag isn't conducive to teamwork and getting along. Men understand the pack system. We may not be friends with our boss, but we cooperate and get the job done because it has to be done. Women may have the family centric gene of "i'm getting mine because my family is the best". Hence theres alot of women-women tension at the work place. Its true especially if you've seen the tension between female boss and female employee ... freakin death stares everywhere...

Okay that's pretty much it... My argument has tons of holes in it and I know that it can be refuted easily. But this is my gut feeling about why things are the way they are. I'm not being sexist, I'm only saying that we are descendant from those in which these inherited tendencies kept them alive. I'm not saying women dont belong in the workplace, dear God no. I'm just saying that due to our ancestors, they have to try harder to break away from their genetic tendencies in order to work alongside each other, whereas it comes easier to men (thats not the only thing that comes easier). It's like saying I have to try harder not to watch pr0n than Willy Bob does. that fact my friend, is an obvious truth. I am a human, I have willpower, and I have a choice. But my genetic desires make that choice very hard (that's what she said).

If you guys have any theories as to why women dont get along as easily as men, I'd like to learn more! Please tell so in the comments.

By the way guys who are single may see this as a reason to stay single and avoid the drama. But don't worry guys! Women usually only treat other women like crap, so you're in the clear! Totally In!

By the way, this is post 300! This is madness! THIS IS BEEEE AIEEE AAAAYYYYYY !


Willy Bob said...

Your argument is totally legitimate. It's hard for women to get along with each other because of jealousy. We're competitive and crave attention. We seek flaws in our kind and feel threaten when attention is diverted from us. This ties in with your discussion on women working within their family (in a hunter-gatherer tribe). Women played a key role as the nurturer in a family unit and thrived from being that important figure. Bring other women in the mix and that throws off the dynamic of being THE head female (so to speak).

Love the shit stank talk and I can definitely hold off on the c0rn...oops I mean p0rn longer than you Mac. lol

Willy Bob said...

Something else to think about...can men and women be strictly just friends?

J.Frosty said...

lol it's cause her cooking sucks.

to answer Lisa's question: Not forever.

CP said...

I think it's based off some females immature insecurities. Obviously not all females act like that and for those I can think of, they are all mature and have all looked pass whatever insecurities they have and as a result get along well with other females. I don't blame females for acting this way as there are many things men can not control and fail at as well. This is just how we are created.

Anh Di said...


girls strictly best friends with guys?

Yes, as long as atleast one of them are not single. And both accept and do not want to go anywhere outside the friend zone. I think these friendships are rare haha.

v-man said...

Girls being best friends with guys: totally possible. Communication is key in establishing and drawing boundaries for the friendship. Its hard, but it makes things interesting

CP said...

Possible but very hard as it's human nature to like the person you spend a lot of time with. Is friend zone an excuse to say no to a guy? Seriously, guys are always ready to break out of that zone if an opportunity arises. If the guy also uses friend zone, it simple means he doesn't like her. Sorta the same reason girls use it?

Mac OBryan said...

there are no boundaries when primal desires kick in. I'm with Chris in that it depends if you had an attraction for the person in the first place when you decided to be "just friends"